Monday, June 06, 2005

Nice Just Doesn't Cut It

This was probably the best weekend I have had in an incredibly long time. I cannot remember the last time I had a drama free weekend because that's how long its been. Sad but true.

So you are wondering how my date was with Sean Friday night. Well he is very nice, which as everyone knows is the black kiss of death for all men. This is not to say that I won't go on another date, but I already know that this is going no where. Why? Let me explain. First off, I'm soooooo not physically attracted to him. He's nice looking, but nothing, nope, nada came to me throughout the whole night. Not one god forsaken spark encountered this body AT ALL. He was able to keep up his end of the conversation which was nice - but there's that damn word again...Nice. That's all there was.

One or two things that I didn't like, he kept looking at my boobs. Now I have fabulous boobs as some of my male friends will attest. Chris and I have had an entire conversation about this so I know I'm not just making this up. Don't worry B, your time will come he he he.... They are not huge, definitely not small, but plump and juicy all the same so I can't blame the guy for looking, but it wasn't a "quick glance, let's get back to the conversation before she notices" type of look, it was, "Oh man I want to touch them and put my face in between and go Blllluuurrrrhhhhh" kind of look. That totally erked me and made me mad because our conversation was flowing - I had my A game pulled out for a neighborhood pick up game. I wasted good conversation and funny stories when all I had to do was put on a bikini top and smile, oh wait, I forgot, most men just want that.

Secondly, he kissed me. (No tongue don't worry). This isn't a crime per say, but I was IN THE MIDDLE of putting on lipstick outside the restaurant while sitting on the bench. With the lip pencil in one hand and the mirror in my other, he leaned over me and was in my face, it was like UH HELLO I'M HERE TO SMOOCH YOU. Ok, so guys, here's the thing. Don't do that. I'm pre-occupied and I haven't given you the batty eyelashes, come hither look. My body language has NOT invaded your space at all despite the fact that I am a little tipsy. Even though we have agreed that I have nice boobs, it still does not give you the pass go collect a kiss and a $100 bucks signal.

I was smart though, I made sure I had my friend Nicole call me and we met up at another bar. I was nice (URGH) and invited him to the bar, but he was SO out of his element there and left. He kissed me again good night and tried to slip the tongue, I stood back and gave him the NO NO. Sorry pal, it ain't happening. We left it at that he was going to call me this week and we might do something again, but I'm going to be honest with him. Actually now that I am writing about this, its making me angry and I don't think I'll be seeing him again anytime soon. I just don't know how to tell him. I need advice people. Again, he was cordial, he's a Yankee fan, he's a football fan, he likes the Rangers, but we all can't be perfect right? We both like to do LOTS of stuff, but....Well that's just it, there's a "but." I've been through the ringer and I need to be picky and if there's even a small "but," then that means its not for me. Right? My gut says not, so now its NEXT.

Actually I'm glad that it didn't work out. I want to take a little time for me. I'll meet a guy when I'm least expecting it and when the time is right. I'm fun, smart, extremely outgoing and I've been told I'm attractive so I don't think I'll have as hard of a time as I thought I would, but I need to learn patience and not get into something right away. Summer is here and I need to enjoy it. I'm getting a little funny 'he he' feeling about the whole being single thing so I want to enjoy it, for now. I still wish I had strong arms around me at night and someone to whisper I love you in my ear, but that will come with time. I know it.

Sunday
I went to Six Flags Great Adventure with my friend Joe and a couple other people yesterday. Joe and I were complete retards and I can't believe we weren't asked to leave the park. We were in our own stupid world creating havoc with every step we took through that park. That is NOT an exaggeration. We were loud, lude, crude, obnoxious, and completely sober. Everyone stayed back about 10 feet when we walked because they did not know what was going to happen next. I lost my voice, not from yelling on the rides, but yelling at Joe, with Joe and well, just being an idiot all the same - it was fucking great. It was exhilarating. I have found a partner in crime and I'm happy about that. I got to be the person that I've missed so much. I don't mean I got to be an idiot, I mean I got to unload and unleash my inner child.....My inner 5 year old child that is. I felt alive. I was "**the Cat" (B that was for you) and I wasn't drunk. Although "the Cat" did appear for a short while Friday night. (**See Editor's note below).

Joey Bitch, I love ya like a red headed step child. Thanks for the outrageous time Sunday, you friggin rock. No wait, I do.




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"The Cat" is an alter ego dubbed by my good friend Chris, otherwise known as B. B and I have had some very good drunken times with many more to come now that I'm getting out of this funk. B gave me this alter ego name about 2-3 years ago. I do not know its origins but it has come to explain unexplainable behavior over the years. The Cat has been known to dance on stage with live bands, get inebriated beyond belief and she is now becoming infamous for leaving extremely funny drunk messages on voicemail. Everyone loves "The Cat."

2 comments:

Meredith said...

Matt I appreciate the comment because it is NEVER my intention to hurt anyone. I'll be honest, he's not an idiot and I think I already conveyed this to him Friday night, but I hate it when people aren't on the same page as me. Thanks for the advice. You are on my list of people who rock.

Meredith said...

Steve I'd have to say a little bit of both. I need that "zap" in order for something to happen. It didn't.