Partying Like it's 1999

Oye vey

Friday night.

I had initially decided to stay in Friday night, but when the bat call came in from H, I had to take it and meet up with him to retrieve my funds. One thing about H before I go on, you can NEVER get in touch with him. Never. He doesn't own a cell phone and he doesnt' use an answering machine - all he has is caller I.D. Smooth right? More like shady, but whatever, it was now or never. Long story short, I met up with him and one beer turned into two bars and a free nights' stay at his brother and sister-in-laws house on the pull out sofa. The best part of the evening was the fact that his brother was anhiliated and he kept creeping down the stairs trying to get in bed with us - in his underwear! Ewwwwww!!!!!!! That's right, I saw more of his brother in one night than I care to in a lifetime. We would start to fall asleep and thinking the dog was on the bed, we'd ignore it, but then I would look up and his brother was starring at the both of us. - well maybe you had to be there, thinking about it now, it was a little creepy.

I know, you guys want to know if I slept with H, well yes I did - in the same bed. Fooling around happened. But I didn't let it go too far because that's not what I wanted.

Went home Saturday morning and remained semi-comatose for the better part of the day, when the bat phone rang and it was Schmitty.

"SCHMITTTYYYYY!!!!"

"What's going on? What are you doing?"

"Dude Schmitty, I got home this morning at 11. I'm in bed right now. Why what's up?"

"We hanging tonight?" Schmitty asked.

"Of course. Dare you ask? What are the plans?"

"Be at my house at 4. We'll pre-game and then head out. Melanie is going to meet us after work tonight."

"Sounds like a plan Stan. See you in two hours."

Run down of the evening:

5 bars in 8 hours. Heard a band called Urban Trip, not bad, not bad at all. They did a lot of covers of songs you didn't think a rock band would or could do, like Busta Move, by Young MC - totally kicked ass. But they really had me when they played Bon Jovi - did I sing with the band? AW, HELLS YEH! By 2:00 am, I was shit crocked, but its all good. I decided at this point I needed to sober up because if I didn't then I would get really depressed that I wasn't making out with a boy at the end of the night. Ok, not really, but anyway, we hit a diner and then I got home by 4:30 a.m.

All was not lost though. Spoke to Kris with a K (who was not in attendance) a few times via Schmitty's phone throughout the course of the night. Here's his scoop - makes pretty good money working for a big phone company. He just bought a 4 bedroom home and moves in next week and he's my age. You'll remember that Kris with a K and I have had a long time flirt thing going on. In summary.....Ding Ding Ding Ding! We now have a new contestant on Mer is Right. Gave him my digits and called it a day.

One more funny note about Saturday evening - at about 8:00 p.m., the bat phone went off and it was B. B was down the shore, so that could only mean one thing - he was piss drunk. Not one to dissappoint, he sure as hell was.

"Yyooooooooooooo. What are you doing?" asked B.

"Drinking by the Waterfront. Dude you sound tanked. What are you doing?"

"I'm laying in bed. I was thinking about taking a nap, but you know.....I think I'm gonna get up and go back out."

"Oh B, you kill me. How did you get so tanked?"

"BEER PONG YO!!!!!" He slurred into the phone.

"Nice, you're funny B."

"So uh, when am I gonna get to see those C's Mer?"

"You wanna see my C's?"

"Yeh, you sooooooo want to make out with me."

"Oh B, I thought that making out with me would be AWKWARD, no?"

"It would, but it would also be coooolllll...."

"I gotta go now B, talk to you later."

"Later."

I love my drunk friends.

Sunday I spent the day with my good friend Kelly. Kelly is a very good friend of mine - you would know more about her if I spoke about the Remy incident, but I'm not ready to divuldge that whole mess yet. It was her birthday and we sat pool side drinking with her family and a few friends. It was by far the most relaxing thing I did all weekend long. I'm so glad we got to chill out and talk boyz because apparently there isn't a lot I know about dating. Lately I've just been doing what I want, but there is so much I need to know. Like the fact that guys usually wait a few days to call after you give them your number. WTF? Why is that? If I want to talk to someone, I'm going to talk to them. But whatever. I'm sorry I didn't have the funds to head out to the club with them that night, but I was also incredibly tired. Long story short, I had three other BBQ's to hit and I blew off each one of them and went home to bed instead.

Monday, the Mother Day of All BBQ's - did not disappoint. Shit crocked, high nigga pie is what you called what I did yesterday. Holy Toledo, I'm still recovering and I actually stopped eveything at 9:30 p.m. My original plan was to take it easy and head out to do some photography. The bat signal went up and plans were changed. I wound up at H's brother's house and did what everyone else across the nation did, I drank my face off and smoked some poot. Nice.

Oh and H, to answer you question about Spit or Swallow - I couldn't tell ya, I get too eager and jump the guy before I have a chance to find out. But that won't happen with you, so its all good.

Ok, but here is where I need to ask some questions. If I'm fooling around with H, I can still date right? Its July and I said that I would wait until July to really start dating, so I'm good in that respect. I mean, we aren't "together" in any sense. We drink and smooch, nothing more - yet. I know I'm not a 4:00 a.m. hook-up, but I am a dick tease nonetheless that will have to produce something soon, which I have no problems with, trust me, he's a good kisser remember? Seriously, I'm taking my time with him because there is a history of him getting hurt and I don't want to do that to him either. Asked him about the 4:00 a.m. hook-up and he said that I wasn't. His sister-in-law informed me that H doesn't bring girls to her home either so he must be "into" me. ALSO, about 3 guys at the BBQ made comments to me (one asked me if he could kiss me too, he he he) and each time H was present, he made sure his presence was known and shot them down for me. WTF? I'm not dating him, but I guess guys need to mark their territory. Whatevs. He is what he is and I don't want anything from him other than hanging. Again, whatevs.

Kris with a K called me yesterday and we spoke for a little bit (while I was at the BBQ). He's very nice and the conversation seems to flow easily. I couldn't speak for long because I was shitfaced and although I thought I was incredibly funny and charming, I don't think it was appropriate for me to try and hold up a semi-intelligent conversation. He's supposed to call me back this week. Should be interesting.

I have more to say but this post is already long winded and I know I've left out details and this is all over the place. Somehow I feel like this post was unfulfilling, but deal ok? I'm tired. Sheesh.