The Memory Meter

Ever smell something and it brings you RIGHT back to a specific moment in time? Its like you're walking around minding your own business and BOOM! you are brought back to a moment set back in your memory and it just freaks you the fuck out. It can be a good memory that makes you smile or a horrid one that makes you sad or even angry.

This happened to me TWICE today. Its only 8:13 a.m. and its happened twice. Go figure.

First moment was getting on the elevator and I guess someone must have been wearing a ton of cologne - men's Curve. Ted used to wear it all the time. Today it is raining and the combination of the heat, the humidity and the cologne brought me back to a moment when I was sitting in his bedroom waiting for him. It was summer and we had just started dating and I was happy. I had that "new relationship" feeling - you know, the one where you don't know everything about the other person and its still exciting and fresh, untarnished and pretty. I looked down at the ground and a smile crossed my face. It was a good memory and I welcomed it fully.

The second moment, and this one was even more vivid than the first and it actually occurred only moments after I got off the elevator. First a little background. I grew up in a town called Fair Lawn, New Jersey. Nabisco has one of its headquarters there and they actually bake most of the goods you have in your home at this particular facility. Fair Lawn is not a big town, but its not that small either - still, whenever Nabisco bakes, if the wind is just right, you can catch a whiff from just about anywhere. I can remember days sitting in grade school with the windows open doing something like, I don't know, Social Studies or Math and WHAM, that delicious cookie smell would waff into the room. Everyone would lift their heads, noses in air and just sniff...aaaaahhhhhh - class actually came to a hault. How could it not!!!

I'm getting off the elevator here at work, I walk outside (again, our campus consists of about 5 buildings) and I'm hit with a delicious sent of cookies and chocolate. I wanted to touch myself the smell was that overwhelming and yummy. And then WHAM!! I'm in grade school on the playground with all my friends (mostly boys) playing a pick up game of two hand touch football and the game stops so we can all enjoy the smell coming from Nabisco. AAaaaahhhhhhh, that's lovely.

Isn't it weird that this happens? I know it has to do with your Olfactory system and all, but I think its amazing. I mean I'll smell a certain hairspray and then shazaaam, I'm in high school getting ready to go to school. Every time I smell Aramis I think of my ex-boyfriend - the architect - the guy that I dumped because I'm a freakin' moron - but that's another story.

Its the same way with songs. Right now I'm listening to a mix and an old school song is playing - Expose - "I'll never get over you getting over me" - this reminds me of having a crush on a boy and things never panning out, still, its a good memory because it makes me feel alive for having memories of life at all. I'm a romantic - I'm very nostolgic and I welcome memories. Memories to me always bring a small smile, they are never malicious in nature, but truly small treasures that I'm always fond of.

For instance, right now (again this is an old mix) Naughty by Nature O.P.P is playing. Instantly I think about being a freshman in high school driving around in this kid's truck - he was a senior and this was completely taboo to be in a car with an older boy. I'd later wind up dating him - after I dated his brother. Whoops.

I like and welcome memories, sometimes I pop in a certain CD or tape and just listen. My favorite days to do this are rainy days. I get into my best nostalgia moods and bring myself back in time and recount the good stuff. The stuff that makes me feel lucky to have loved and lost rather than never loved at all.