Friday, November 11, 2005

Bag of Ass

It's Friday - so you know what that means right? I'm fucking rocking a hangover like nobody's business. I'll never learn. Idiot.

Please don't lecture me because I dont' think I'd survive right now.

Annnndddd....brain hemorrhage commensing.......NOW!!!

Last night we went out - what else is new, but I said,

"Guys, just know that I'm only going out for a few drinks and I plan on leaving early."

"And I don't really feeling like singing tonight."

I'm such a bad liar.

Three pints of pure alcohol and 4 shots later I was a fucking rock star on a mission to kill myself. But I was smart and started drinking water early so I could get home safely - wow, I used my brain for a change - mark the date. At least I got home around 1 a.m. - not bad for me right? As for the singing, I in fact did not want to sing, but Trixie made me do one song with her - and then people kept bringing me up with them - even the DJ had me sing "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey - damn, I can sure hit those high notes - can't blame him I guess.

Did drunk dials occur? But of course, is my name Meredith?? I think I left about 5 - I apologize now to whoever received one. I get carried away, but know that those dials help a great make me laugh that is.


MySpace update - why do so many guys feel it is necessary to send you pictures of themselves with no shirt on? What is that? Do they think I will reciprocate? And too many men coincidentally have no hair on their chests. What the fuck is that anyway?

AND, the stupid emails continue. Fat, ugly dudes send me some of the worst emails ever. If you dont' have the looks, shouldn't you put in a little more effort??? WTF? I'm not shallow enough that I won't give you props if you are intelligent. But come on now - writing in the form of Ebonics just doesn't cut it. Then again if they knew what effort was, they wouldn't be fat, ugly dudes now would they?

And why would an 18 year old want to chill with me? I'm 10 years older - GOOD GRIEF!!!


anne arkham said...

I've had 18-year-olds want to hang with me. I'm 37.

Merni said...

I used to bang 30-43 year olds when i was 18.