Thursday, January 19, 2006

Lots of Stuff Today


Lots of stuff to touch upon today. So let's get started shall we? First, special thanks to Trixie (on the left) because she's helping me plan my birthday party. That's right, yours truly (on the right) is turning the big 29 come February 4th. Every year something goes wrong for my birthday - its inevitable. Although something will most definitely go wrong this year too, she's trying to make it a good one. LOVE YA BABE!!!!

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Now yesterday I was in a tizzy (what else is new) and because of my issue I went to a very wise and powerful woman for advice......my mother. That woman, is good, let me just tell you. A little background info - in all of my past relationships, I was the giver. I was the one who took care of everything accepting only a little in return. George, my first real love, was the only guy that I've ever dated who wasn't like that....and of course he met his fate with one quick blow. SHAZAAM!! Gone. Since him, I've been the nurturer, I've been the one to take charge, I've also been with people who have presented challenges....and we all know, I'm all about the challenge, I get bored so easily.

Jake is the first guy to have his shit together. My exhusband had his shit together in the respect that he had a job, helped fix stuff around the house, did his family obligations, but I did everything else. We don't need to get into more than that, but there were always issues, same thing with Ted.

This is the first time, in a long time, I can breathe easy and that my friends is very very new to me. I'm not used to it. I'm not used to someone who is so independent and....well grown up. Its really nice and I have to remember that. I can't say that I'm 100% cured or anything, I am after all a wreck and a work in progress. I hope this guy does teach me to let down my guard - I'm anxiety ridden over committment issues, but I'm willing to work through them.

Go me.

And go him.

HOWEVER, (come like I was going to let things end so easily), I am not exclusive.....yet. And this new guy is worth at least meeting. I don't want to play with fire - I've said this before and I don't want to hurt anyone. The new guy knows that I'm "involved" and like he said, just meeting won't hurt nothing.

Isn't that how it all starts? Innocently? We'll see - I'll keep you updated.....because I love you.

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Another note - has anyone been watching Idol? Good god - I am ALL about The Idol. I fucking love that show and I can't wait for next week. If you love Idol like I do, please email me.

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Remember this post about meeting this guy? I told you the story and I'm sure everyone got a chuckle or two from it. But I didn't tell you the WHOLE story and I think I'm ready to do so. Its a bit of a doozy, but good god, you guys are going to love it....because its a disaster.

From the post about our date, you know that we had a good time. You know that we did a little kissy kiss in the car after the date. What you don't know is this......when we got to my car (it was raining), he hoped in and we were talking....talking led to lots of kissing. Yes I got felt up, but I kept my hands to myself - for the most part. Then I drove him to his car to kind of break things up a bit because it was getting intense. He then proceeded to ask me if I'd get in his car. Uh no. I was trying to leave but he was a good kisser and of course, we kissed some more. At one point he made a comment about my breasts (like who doesn't??? Duh.) and in true Mer fashion I grabbed them and said, "What these breasts?" - his response - "Oh, don't do that. Antonio likes it when you grab your breasts."

Let's stop right there. Normal women would have seen this as a red flag, but Mer is a little naive and played into it and of course did it again and laughed her little evil laugh. Mooooha ha ha ha ha.

Wrong move.

He made a comment about touching himself and the way he said it and how he said it, had me believing it was a joke. I SWEAR TO GOD, I looked out the window for a split second, next thing I know - his johnson is in his hand.

You can't make this shit up.

"Look at the time. I gotta go." - and I swear I ended it there and said good bye. MY GOD - what is wrong with him!! Better question...what is wrong with me because the story doesn't end there.

Next day Antonio calls me up and apologizes for his behavior. He tells me that we got really "drunk" and I'm "sexy as hell" and he couldn't help it. But he wants to make it up to me and take me to dinner. He asks if I want to meet at his place and I decline stating I'd rather meet at the restaurant. Long story short, dinner is really nice and we have a great time.

With me so far? Antonio proceeds to tell me all about his comedic endeavors and he tells me about this video he's done for promotion. Somehow he coerces me to go back to his place. (you know where this is going already) and I agree. But the mother fucker neglects to tell me that his living room was destroyed by the flooding we had the week before. Television, furniture, ceiling - all gone. Where is the only TV and VCR in his place? You guessed it...his bedroom.

Gut told me to leave, but I'm an asshole so I stayed. I sat on the edge of his bed and watched the movie, but after a little more prodding and assurance that everything is ok, I laid next to him and watched the video. It was in fact pretty fun and we were having a good time.

Then it happens. At the end of the video he starts to kiss me and I'm liking it. We're making out in true make out fashion and I'm feeling like this is all good. No alarms, its just fine at this pace. Right? Wrong. This guy whips its out again with no indication from me. I didn't go near his johnson, I didn't indicate I wanted to see it. Nothing. AND he begins to rub himself.

AAAAHHHHHH!!!!! Remember, we're just kissing. In my head I'm like, "Fuck this - I gotta go." Nonchalantly I get out of it and look at the time - past 10, school night - good excuse.

I'm not a school marm and anyone who has read my other website knows that I've got a dirty little mind - I can dish it and take it. But I'm so not into a guy whipping his equipment out after just a few smooches. Not cool.

So there you have it. The true story behind Waterboy. I never spoke to him again because quite frankly he was a creep. I hate the fact that when I finally decided to put myself out there, the first guy I meet on MySpace is someone who took advantage of the fact that I am naive. I know it happens, I'm not a complete idiot, but in retrospect it happened to teach me a lesson. He wound up being only one of four guys that I ever met through MySpace. Thank God.

Laugh all you want at this story, I know, I'm a retard. I don't need lectures. AND of course after relaying this story to my girlfriends, I get ribbed about it often. It is a funny story, but now in retrospect, I get a little scared thinking about the position I put myself in. Never again. Never.

3 comments:

NCTRNL said...

I haven't even read the whole post yet but damn you're seriously hot...

Dave D said...

You're 28 and divorced?

anne arkham said...

You look so cute. And the legendary boobs look good, too.