I was going to post a picture of Ted. I had it all set and ready to go, but I deleted it. You know why, because seeing this asshole makes me sick. Honestly if I see him now, I want to puke. Not because I am scared, far from it, its because I can't believe I made such a huge mistake as him and seeing him only reminds me of that.
Yesterday was court. When I walked into the corridor and saw him, my blood went cold and I started to shake. I guess it was the reality and shock of the magnitude this all came to. My sister who usually knows that I am a pillar of strength, grabbed my hand and held it. I love her for that.
In the court room there is always a cop there to ensure safety and institute order. Guess what? He calls MY NAME and asks to speak to me in the hall. I almost shit myself. I go out there and he says,
"I uh, know Mildred." - Mildred is my cousin and she works in the jail.
"Oh my god. How did you find out about me? She couldn't make it today to be with me."
"Yeh, I received a note this morning you were going to be in my courtroom. She got in touch to make sure that you had someone."
"No way. That's excellent. Thank you."
"Do you think you need an escort to your car later?" - Is this service or what? Too bad he was married.
"No, he's not drunk so I don't think anything will happen." - he snorted at this comment in a laugh kind of way.
"Ok, well which one is he?"
I gave him Ted's description and we were on our way. Ted saw the entire event and he was rather still for the remainder of the morning. My cop friend made sure he made some serious eye contact to make Ted feel uncomfortable. I loved Every. Single. Second. of it. We also spoke during every break and made nicey nice. Again, too bad he was married.
Of course, I was not the first case, which I was hoping to be since my last name is in the beginning of the alphabet - why would I think for a second that the court might actually do something systematically? Stupid me. Instead I had to endure about 8 hours of this shit. I got to see coke heads, drug addicts and alcoholics deny the fact that they have abusive behavior. But I also got to see how things worked. The judge made a little speech in the beginning which wound up being very informative and well spoken. He told the defendants that if they admit the violence, then the plaintiff won't testify, ensuring that emotions don't get too high. ALSO, for every defendant accused of drinking and/or doing drugs, he mandated drug testing and anger management.
Seeing that the judge never sided with the defendant (well basically because it was obvious these people had issues), it occurred to me that if they knew Ted wasn't going to debate the charges, we could get out rather early. Problem was, that meant I had to speak to him to find out. The perfect opportunity presented itself at about 2:00 while we were on lunch. My sister and I were standing in the hallway when Ted came in. I turned to him and asked;
"Are you going to debate the charges?"
"No way. I just want to get the hell out of here. I can't stand this."
"Ok, because I'll tell Dennis (the cop) that and maybe he can push us ahead and we can get out fast." I was direct and I tried to keep it fast.
The bastard leaned against the wall and made like he was going to sit and chat with us. He even tried to be funny;
"Yeh you know I hate this crap. I can't stand courtrooms."
"Well that's because you've been in them enough," I said.
I turned my back and continued to talk to my sister hoping he got the hint that we were done. He did and left. Asshole.
In my entire life, I've never even received a speeding ticket - this jerk has two DUI's before the age of 24 AND he has a rap sheet a mile long. How did I EVER get involved with this person, I will never know but I can tell you, I don't really analyze it, I just want to forget it.
Back to the courtroom. When it came our turn to speak - finally - Ted said he accepted the charges. He told the judge that he has an awful temper and sometimes he can't control himself. The judge took pity and gave him a $100 fine and an anger management mandated session. I NEVER GOT TO SPEAK! I had pictures of him violating his restraining order. I had documentation of his threats - ALL FOR NOTHING. But this is the kicker Ted mentioned to the judge that he has appointments in my work complex of an important nature (I can't divulge their nature for obvious reasons). So the judge has allowed him to come to my place of employment for his appointments. IT'S ALL BULLSHIT. He wants to be able to come to my job so he can see his new girlfriend. He just couldn't leave well enough alone. He can't see her after work hours, he has to come there. I'm not making this up, its the truth and I would stake my life on it. He's doing it to get back at me - to rub it in my face. Too bad he doesn't realize I don't give a shit.
I'm so pissed that I didn't get to have my day in court. That I didn't get to tell the judge that this asshole is an alcoholic. I didn't get to say that he's stolen pills from not only me, but my sister. I didn't get to tell everyone what a dick he is. Everyone else did. But I didn't. I was pretty upset. I should be happy that the restraining order is in effect, but I'm not. I want him to suffer the way that I did. Then again I should remember that he'll never feel the pain that I felt because he's incapable of pain - his drinking and drug abuse will not allow for such things. Feel a little pain, drink a little more.
Ted, as we all know is a little dim whitted - to say the least. However he was smart enough to not allow the alcohol and drugs to come up. He was able to say what he had to say to ensure that I didn't get to speak. I tried, trust me I did, but the judge shushed me. Dillweed. I should have behaved like the rambling degenerates before me and interrupted and screamed my head off. But I'm an idiot.
I'm just upset that I will have to see him around, it kind of defeated the purpose - well sort of. He had to go to another building to be finger printed and photographed. I'm hoping this goes on his record and he gets screwed out of the Newark job. I know that's bad and I should be a better person and wish him well - you know, take the high road. But I'm fucking sick of ALWAYS taking the high road. I'm praying that karma bites his ass bad.
Actually I'm pretty over it now. I just had to recount it all to you and be honest about the anger and hurt I felt immediately after the hearing. By the time we got to the car, I was over it. Really I was and my sister and I were able to have a conversation other than what was going to happen or what did happen. I'm so happy its all over. Or at least I hope its all over.
I'm really looking forward to having a good summer. I've been through enough and I'm ready to live my life on my terms, not on anyone else's. Let freedom ring....