Friday, June 03, 2005

Nerves

My nerves are shot. I've lost 6 lbs. in a week - not that I'm complaining about that. I've always had a healthy appetite - always. Despite everything I have ever been through I've NEVER lost my appetite, until now. I can't remember a time when I wasn't able to just tell myself things would be ok and not believe myself. I think its because so much has happened in such a little amount of time. I keep telling myself that it could be so much worse. I keep listening to my friends and family and I repeat their kind words in my head as much as I possibly can.

On a lighter note, I am going on a date tonight. His name is Sean and he's a cop. We met at a BBQ over the Memorial Day weekend. We've spoken on the phone twice and he seems very nice and he hasn't given me a reason to think otherwise either. We are going out tonight so wish me luck. I will be very honest and upfront about where I am and how I feel, honesty is the best policy. I will remember to go with my gut. I just want him to know from day one that I have to take it slow. That I did and am still going through something very tough. Some think I shouldn't even be dating yet, others say go for it. I say go with the flow because hey, you never know. Ok that was corny. I gotta go before this gets out of hand.

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